Brit Award nominees – flogging a dead horse?

The album, the Brit Award 2012 press release tells us, is not dead. Despite the growth in single track purchases thanks to iTunes et al, many so-called serious artists are still putting out what we used to call LPs. It’s a good thing, too. Is there anything as thrilling as the perfect album? When an [...]

Bring back Top of the Pops?

In these troubled economic times, we’re all having to adjust to a pre-boom reality. Gone are the days of poaching a quail’s egg to accompany your morning fry-up; no, now we boil a shoe. An old shoe. That we found on the street. On the foot of a homeless man. Yes, that’s the 21st Century. [...]

Is it time to take Take That seriously?

Men and women, not always but often, have disagreed on many things about music; its purpose, its purpose, its value and its quality. And as music journalism has traditionally been a male-heavy occupation, the view of what is good and what is bad comes from those who pee standing. Witness The Beatles by way of [...]

The perils of patronage

During the recent Mercury Music prize press blitz, you’d have been forgiven for thinking John Bramwell, better known as I Am Kloot, was only in the running because he was pals with Elbow’s Guy Garvey. The media, looking for an angle, decided the comparision between the struggling indie band and the massively-successful indie band was [...]

The Live Experience – The music vs the show

Our intrepid reporter Mrs.Morrissey attended last nights Coldplay show at Hampden in Glasgow. We’re not carrying a review because it’s Coldplay and it doesn’t count. You know what Coldplay sound like and, in simplistic terms, you’ll know whether you would have enjoyed it or you wouldn’t have. They are Coldplay. They played all the Coldplay [...]

Limited Supply? – EMI in a bit of bother

Joss Stone may not be everyone’s cup of tea, and rightly so, but news that the vacuous Welsh poptart is so desperate to quit ailing label EMI she is willing to return a £2m advance should set alarm bells ringing at the venerable old institution. Despite a fundamental lack of talent or likability, Stone was [...]

You Couldn’t Sell All Your Tickets – U2 Struggle While AC/DC Thrive

ELM’s most scabrous contributor, ScantRegard, here looks at how the economy is affecting different acts at the top end of the market. And laughs at some of them. Ah, I love the smell of schadenfreude in the morning. You see, rumour has it that our good friends U2 are imminently about to start reducing the [...]

Ivor Novello Awards – Art V Commerce

Yes, let hosannas ring out and deities be praised, it’s the Ivor Novello Awards nominations time of year again. The longest running and, we are told, most prestigious award that it is possible for yer average overly hirsute long-haired layabout to win, because it is about the songwriting. That most indefinable of all skills, that [...]

One Vision?

Last week brought us the news that uberproducer Brian Eno, arty adviser to the glitterati, had banned Chris Martin from attending recording of Coldplay’s new album. Sensible move, you may well have thought, but it turns out the ban is actually a two week holiday. It seems Martin, shockingly, is a bit of a control [...]

Chris Martin – Honest Assesment or Ultimate Cock-End Move?

The Onion has been responsible for many acts of genius since it came into being, but a favourite of mine was the headline ‘Asshole Admits ‘I Am An Asshole’ In Ultimate Asshole Move’. I like that a lot. It brilliantly summed up for me that peculiarly modern cynicsm, that by simply admitting to a flaw [...]

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